Garden of Eden Goes Green: Fig Leaf Ban

White House Fine Art Traditilon Continues

As we marvel at the lightening speed in which Impeachment is proceeding (excuse me while I have an epileptic seizure, this is truly dizzying) it’s time to put the “beauty of the Constitution/genius of the founding fathers” crowd on notice. This is your last chance.

You’ve had four attempts and you’ve accomplished nothing. Impeachment is an antiquated 18th century notion that has no bite, and certainly provides no deterrent, in the modern world.

It’s a foregone conclusion Congress will vote for its personal, political interests over any national one. (There’s no money in it for them, why bother.) There will be no consequences for what we’ve lived through for four years. The next tyrant who takes the White House will be even more emboldened.

Just as in my personal life, there is no check (in the mail) or balance (in my bank account). Co-equal branches, my ass. The Constitution Emperor has no clothes

But then I’m not a complainer, I’m a doer. I’ve always had that do-do mojo cranking overtime. My life has been full of do-do. And I can still see a small turd-lette of hope on the horizon.

If the Senate would unexpectedly vote for impeachment we would be entering new territory: the penalty phase. They would be writing their own rules as they impose punishment that only needs a majority vote.  It could (and should) include: cancellation of any pension; cancellation of secret service protection; ban on future office holding; and especially no money for a library research center.

Any bibliotechque funds will be funneled through Trump International Holdings anyway. Probably via their newly designed and soon to be bankrupt Linden, NJ project: Betsy DeVos’ She-Bang Pole Dancing Lounge and Casino.

Keeping in mind the aforementioned Emperor, however, an olive branch is In order. Out of necessity it will need to be a symbolic twig. In our ethereal quest for poetry we can’t be seen destroying yet another orchard. The offering comes in the form of White House portraiture.

It’s important we continue the tradition of memorializing the occupants of the White House. In this case there’s no cost to the taxpayer. The artist is not seeking compensation for their time (almost 24 hours) or talent (somewhat indeterminant). Although if there are any corporations handing out grants or fellowships, it’s well within your rights under the law to grease the palm.

Remember Rockefeller Center, get in on the ground floor. Support a starving artist! Adopt a nattering ne’er-do-well!

GofE, 2021


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