To support Jerry’s claims that she did not marry for money and is financially independent. Rupert Murdoch will be launching a new celebrity gossip weekly by the end of the year. Mrs. Murdoch is the sole owner.

The format is to be all photos and no text. Captions will be done in emoji only. Jerry said this innovation was necessary to accommodate “the reading levels of the Hall Clan back in Texas.”

The publishers of Hello! are crying foul. They say it’s a direct rip-off of their iconic publication. To which the Murdochs reply “poppycock” (not to be confused with their other adults-only, sister publication Papi Cock.)

Rupert and Jerry are working frantically to meet the mid-December deadline for the premier issue of Y’All!